Sunday, September 25, 2011

Don't Make a Scene: Star Trek


The Story: This isn't your Daddy's Star Trek.  The conceit of the J.J. Abrams directed franchise-saver is that History has been unalterably changed—so all that Starfleet history you knew...pfft...all gone.  It happened in syndication over and over, alright, like being stuck in a gravity-anomaly time-loop, but with the events of this movie and the planned intervention of a time-travelling Romulan mining processor, everything is different, and many continuity wrongs can be righted (like that 1990's Eugenics War that supposedly birthed Khan—but didn't happen, at least I didn't read about it—or the episode titled "Spock's Brain"). 

Oh...and all those Vulcans.

The changing of the Vulcan race into a Space diaspora is at once an interesting and oddly upsetting choice.  Those "pointy-eared," "green-blooded" "hobglobins" dominated so much of "Trek" history, being so calm, so collected, so...damned logical, that they served more of a purpose as intergalactic kill-joys (what's the opposite of a "drama-queen?") and Voices of Reason (plus, they were everywhere), which scotched the Captain Horatio Hornblower-styled space adventures (and "cowboy-diplomacy") of the The Original Series* (that, and the minuscule budgets of the first series, precluded the exotic, as those Styrofoam boulders and tulip chairs could get expensive).

So, "culling" the Vulcans took away "Star Trek's" safety-net.

Also, it created drama-ripples in The Enterprise Trifecta**—that being Captain Kirk, Mr. Spock, and Dr. McCoy.  One wonders why they ever needed a conference-room on The U.S.S. Enterprise, as things were usually discussed, options debated, arguments broached and decisions made between these three HOD's:***  Kirk was the romantic crown of power with Final Authority and responsibility; "First/Science Officer" Spock was the logical one, using odds and formulas and The Scientific Method to calculate the optimum course; Chief Medical Officer McCoy was a humanist, whose POV included ethics, morality and 30cc's of the Hippocratic Oath.  The typical scene would be Kirk poses problem/Spock offers solution/McCoy brings up implications/Spock dismisses them airily/McCoy raises an eyebrow and his voice, then makes it personal/Kirk says: "Gentlemen, gentlemen...," mollifies them...then does what he wants.

Here, the three men encounter each other for the first time, with unusual results—Kirk and Spock are at odds, and McCoy (played by Karl Urban) is taking Spock's side.  Raised eyebrows ensue.

And Spock—Spock's a jerk.  In control, condescending, and gratingly pointed in his observations and accusations, he uses his intellect and unflappable veneer to use Kirk's emotions and history against him, and—in a way that Leonard Nimoy's mandarin aloofness never allowed—does it with a superior, one might say "cruel," smile on his face.  Sure, Kirk is too cocky by half and needs to be taken down a deck or two, but does the half-human Spock have to enjoy it so much?  Before long, everyone is going to suffer and learn lessons of humility...in fact, it has already begun.

Oh, by the way, if the dialogue is a little hard to follow, as it's broken up by its appearance under screen-captures, blame the director, who wanted to "keep it moving."  The energy he instilled in this "reboot," extended to camera movement, as well (Still—which the camera never is—some of those moves are pretty clever).  

The Set-Up: Starfleet Cadet James Kirk (Chris Pine) has just "beaten" the "no-win scenario" in an Academy simulator—the Kobayashi Maru.**** But, he did it in a way "that had the virtue of never having been tried"—he "changed the conditions of the test," by re-programming the simulator.  In Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, he got a commendation, but, here, he's about to be drummed out of Starfleet by Admiral Bennett (yes, that is Tyler Perry), his chief accuser being someone he's never met in this version of events, Commander Spock (Zachary Quinto).

Action! Full thrusters!


ADMIRAL BARNETT: This session we must address a troubling matter.


BARNETT: James T. Kirk, step forward.



BARNETT: Cadet Kirk...

BARNETT: Evidence has been submitted...

BARNETT: ...to this council that...


BARNETT: ...you violated the ethical code of conduct...


BARNETT: ...persuant to Regulation 174.3...


BARNETT: ...of the Starfleet Code.


BARNETT: Is there anything you care to say before we begin?
KIRK:  Sir?


KIRK:  Yes, I believe I have the right to face my accuser directly.


Bennett nods to Spock in the audience, who stands.

BARNETT: Step forward, please.  This is Commander...


BARNETT: ...Spock.  He is one of our most...


BARNETT: ...distinguished graduates.  He has programmed...


BARNETT: ...the Kobayashi Maru exam...


BARNETT: ...for the last four years.


BARNETT: Commander...
SPOCK: Cadet Kirk...


SPOCK: ...you somehow managed to install a sub-routine thus changing the conditons of the test...


KIRK: Your point being...?


BARNETT: In academic vernacular, you cheated.


The assembled students murmur at the charge.


KIRK: Let me ask you something I think we all know the answer to...


KIRK: ...the test itself is a cheat...

KIRK: ...isn't it?


KIRK: You programmed it to be unwinnable...
SPOCK: Your argument precludes the possibility of a no-win scenario.


KIRK: I don't believe in "no-win scenarios."


SPOCK: Then, not only did you violate the rules, you also failed to understand the principal lesson.


KIRK: Enlighten me.
SPOCK: You, of all people should know, Cadet Kirk...


SPOCK: ...a Starfleet Captain cannot cheat death.

Again, the cadets murmur.


KIRK: "I, of all people..."

SPOCK: Your father, Lieutenant George Kirk, assumed command of...


SPOCK: ...his vessel, before being killed in action, did he not?


KIRK: I don't think you like the fact that I beat your test...


SPOCK: Furthermore...


SPOCK: ...you have failed to divine the purpose of the test...
KIRK: Enlighten me...


KIRK: ...again.
SPOCK: The purpose is to experience...

SPOCK: ...fear.
SPOCK: Fear in the face of certain death....

SPOCK: ...to accept that fear and maintain control of oneself...

SPOCK: ...and one's crew.  This is a quality ...

SPOCK: ...expected of every Starfleet Captain.

STARFLEET PAGE: ...Excuse me, sir...

BARNETT: We've received a distress call...

BARNETT: ...from Vulcan.

BARNETT: With our Primary Fleet involved in the Loren System...

BARNETT: I hereby order all cadets...

BARNETT: ...to Hangar 1...

BARNETT: ...immediately.  Dismissed.

KIRK: Who was that pointy-eared bastard?

McCOY: I don't know.

McCOY: But, I liked him.


Star Trek

Words by Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman

Pictures by Daniel Mindel and J.J. Abrams

Star Trek is available on DVD from Paramount Home Entertainment.



"In another reality...we might have been...friends..."
Leonard Nimoy and The Shatner as The Original Spock and Kirk

* On top of that, the Vulcans...and Mr. Spock, specifically...were used too often for easy counter-point humor and deus ex machina plot resolutions That became rote after awhile.  That...and they had more tricks (mind-melds, neck-pinches, katra transfers) than Batman had pockets in his utility belt.  ("Obviously, I survived, Captain...due to the Vulcan seven toes on my left Vulcan foot").

** Um...I'm sure there was an episode with that title SOME-where...

*** And Freudian stand-in's: McCoy is the Id, Spock the Super-ego, and Kirk the Ego.

**** The "Kobayashi Maru" test was first mentioned in Nicholas Meyer's film of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

Beginning Next Sunday: "The Horror...the Horror"

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